Come What May

There is a constant silence in the room. It is a little later than midnight. Everyone's asleep. I lay flat on my bed, looking straight to the ceiling or may be beyond. Everything is so still, as if the world has come to a halt. I almost hear my heartbeat muffled by a little louder sound of the wall clock that hangs somewhere in the room. 

Tick - tick - tick. The hands of the clock steadily move.

The world may seem to have stopped, but the ultimate driver - Time - is still on, as if saying - Come what may, breathe in breath out and move on! 

That Love

While he was gently slurping his morning coffee, Rudra's eyes were fixed on the beautiful and enchanting face of his new neighbour Riddhi who was busy watering plants in her garden.

Riddhi was a young girl in her twenties having an exquisite charm.With an oblong and fine face cut, she always wore a subtle smile. The soft curls on her dense eyelashes sat elegantly on her dark but bright eyes. Along with a slender and an athletic built she had golden beige skin that accentuated her arresting features.

Rudra was a guy quite conscious about maintaining his chiseled body contours. He would wake up early and go for a short run in the fresh air in joggers park, before hitting the gym floor.

That morning was magical. He had never before seen a lady more beautiful than her. He wished the moment freezed there. He wished she never went out of his sight, ever. But while he was fantasizing about her, someone called her and she slid away in no time. That left him disappointed but he was sure elated to have her as his new neighbor.

Days passed like that. His pining eyes would sometimes succeed in catching her view and sometimes he would have to wait for hours or even days to get her glimpse. He lived with his parents who had shifted permanently in this city a few years back.

In-spite of her phenomenal beauty that she was aware of, Riddhi had no false pride or airs. She believed, it is the different life skills that make a person complete. Physical beauty is a gifted asset that sure ought to be nurtured as well.

One day while she was driving back home, she saw some people gathered on a side, surrounding a man who had met with an accident. She pulled over to see if she could be of any help. She managed to stand on the footpath and peek into the spot. The man had got a bad head injury that had led to a stream of blood flow from his hind head. The man was lying on the road supine. She was aghast to see it was none other than her neighbor, whom she had sometimes seen on his bike or in his open terrace in the house next to hers. It was Rudra.

She made no haste in getting him parked in the front seat of her car and rushing to the nearest hospital. There in the emergency ward she got him examined. More than his being her neighbor, she knew nothing more about him. His parents were travelling abroad on an official tour and they needed at least 36 hours to reach the hospital. And hence she decided to take his charge till his parents arrive.

He was shifted soon to the ICU where upon further examination it was found that there was a blood clot in his head that was fatal and had to be removed. Within few hours he was operated and next morning he was shifted to a special ward.

She was his sole caretaker, apart from the nurses and doctors. She dealt with his condition with patience and without a hint of peeve. That day he remained listless throughout. Next morning when doctor came to examine him, he was awake with minimal body movements. While the doctor was checking his pulse, Riddhi entered the room. She saw him and smiled. Rudra seeing this squinted as if in a dilemma. He could not believe his eyes seeing the girl of his fantasies standing in front of him and giving him the warmest of smiles. He could hear his own heart pound hard! He could feel a sudden stream of blood gush to his head.

Doctor introduced about her as his saviour and told how composed and helping she had been in the last few hours when Rudra had needed an attendant. The doctor then described how badly Rudra was injured and that Riddhi was the one who was the reason for his new life! Rudra was already overwhelmed. But before Riddhi could put forward her modest words, something happened to Rudra. 

He started shivering out of sudden chill. His feet and palms turned cold as ice. Doctor and nurses swaddled him in thick blankets but in vain. He was still cold as never before. He started taking long deep breaths. The sight was very frightening, at least for Riddhi. He got a seizure and he entered the state of Coma. He could feel everything but could not react or move. Doctors investigated his case and concluded that he might or might not return to his normal active state. This greatly perturbed Riddhi and she remained unsettled for many days as she had got attached to this 'just a neighbor' of hers.

Time heals everything. Like every other thing, she moved on.

Several months passed. Rudra's condition did get better and he got resurrected to an active mode in about a year. He recalled all that had happened to him. His parents were the happiest when they got him back. On returning to his house, the first thing that he did was inquire about Riddhi.

She had got married by then. This troubled him like hell. While returning from the hospital he had dreamt of spending the rest of his life with Riddhi, his saviour and more important – his lady love! He was left broken and dismayed.

And so a love story that could never transpire, ended.

Five years later, one fine winter morning Rudra got a phone call that said, 'congrats! You are now a father to a beautiful daughter'. With an immense happiness he smiled and replied, 'Call her Riddhi!'.

The First Cry

They say when a woman becomes mother, her womanhood attains completion. Not sure about the correctness of this statement, but the woman in me has sure become a mother and she sure feels more beautiful now.

How unpredictable life is – last year this time, having a baby in near future was nowhere in our plan. But (somehow) the plan soon changed.  After doing a short analysis of our readiness, I and my husband decided to welcome a new family member!

And soon by god’s grace the most precious news arrived us. The new soul had made room in our life already.

We chose a nearby hospital with a good obstetrician, after checking out reviews. A more disciplined lifestyle including balanced diet, proper sleep, distance from stress and so on, followed next. I bought a good book on pregnancy that I referred to right till the end. I tried to refrain from old wives’ tales and to strictly follow my doctor throughout.

I continued going to office till the eighth month, though I had made up my mind well in advance that I may have to discontinue work due to medical non fitness at any stage of pregnancy. But fortunately all went well and I worked till the date I wanted.

Baby was due in August last week. And as July started, so did my anxiety. The date though more than a month far, was approaching at a fast pace. The thought that eight months have passed already gave me jitters. There also was a sense of achievement that I have successfully nurtured a baby in my womb for quite a period!  July passed somehow – it felt like years though. Now the D day could be any day, as I had read that the baby may arrive any day plus or minus few days of the estimated delivery date.

August being the most awaited time of our life, started with high degree of anxiety, impatience and energy. The image of my baby in my mind got firmer each day. The thought that soon I will have my angel in my hands was in itself a divinity.

I unfortunately picked up dengue in the first week of August and it was lowering my platelets count each day. With no other major symptoms showing up yet, the only thing bothering was the rapidly reducing platelets count. This was accompanied by a low fever that still was bearable. A major concern was that the baby shouldn’t catch the infection.

Doctor called me for a couple of blood tests. On analysing the report it was decided not to wait any further (it was my 38th week of pregnancy, already). Yes, that was the day!

The shear news that i would be operated within an hour, gave the unprepared me chills. It was so quick that i and my husband could hardly get time to inform relatives about it. I was quickly shifted to the ward where all the crude things started happening. A set of nurses came and changed my dress to a loose fitting dressing gown. A catheter was inserted as i could not move out for next couple of days. Few more gross things happened that would be inappropriate to be mentioned here.

Within minutes my doctor came to examine me and my baby. Next, a wheelchair was brought and i was transferred to the OT. i was asked to lie down on the operation table. A batch of doctors was already present there. My doctor was explaining them my and baby’s current status. The anesthesiologist asked me to stay calm as he could clearly figure out my nervousness. I was scared like a chicken. All the sweet dreams of holding the baby for the first time had taken a back seat. All i wanted at that time was to survive that surgery. A couple of IVs were pricked, one being platelet transfusion. I was next given anesthesia in my backbone. Seconds later i couldn’t feel my lower body. I was then blindfolded. I could hear everything happening around and could feel some vibrations on the table. I had surrendered myself to the godly doctors present there. My ears were literally dying to hear that ‘first cry’!

I was dizzy and all ears at the same time. Minutes passed like that. Finally after about half an hour i heard a feeble shriek. But it was so low and short that it got me thinking if this was the one i was waiting for. Then there was silence. Doctors were on with their work though. I could feel some activities still on. A nurse in a corner said - ‘2:43:06’. Was that the birth time of my baby?

Finally i bumbled with the blindfold still on - “How is my baby?”. My doc replied - “Your baby is absolutely fine. Nurse is cleaning him”. I felt like crying. Entire nine months of carrying flashed back. All pains gone. My eyes were pining for baby’s sight.

Few minutes later another doc present there brought him near me and my baby was looking at me with his eyes wide open!  I kissed his soft feet and they took him to the NICU for examination. They shifted me to my ward. After a long wait of around eight hours we finally got him back. He was asleep all cozy in hospital muslin.

I felt like jumping and grabbing my baby but the pain of stitch held me back. Still I managed to cuddle him. The feeling can't be expressed what it was !

An eternal connection was made as he latched for feed. That moment and now are not much different. Just that his toes have grown a bit - I handle his poo better for sure  - I sleep a little less now - he loves me a little more!

When Last

When last

You hung on to a singing bird

When last

The smell of rain captured you

 When last

You felt deep the flowing breeze

When last

A rainbow captivated you

When last

You fingered through a touch-me-not

When last

A row of ants distracted you

When last
You sniffed through pages of a book
When last
A child’s innocence brought smile to you

When last

You admired a blooming bud

When last
The dew drops enthralled you

When last

You gazed at a shooting star

When last

The sunset becharmed you

When last

You drew deep the air of dawn

When last

A heartbeat enraptured you

When last

You zoomed out of daily chores

When last

You stopped by nature not far, but around you

402-A

Pretha lived in an apartment 402-A in East Bangalore. She was a housewife with two little kids. Her husband Raj was a serviceman with a very busy schedule at work. He loved them but could hardly buy any time for his family which he was rueful for.

It was a weekend night when she alongwith her kids was waiting for him to come back from his overtime work. She had prepared his favourite dish for dinner. It was quarter past ten as her phone rang. She rushed to get it expecting his call. But the number flashing was an unknown one. When she recieved the call, the voice on the other side said that her husband has met with an accident on the highway and is in a hospital.

Hearing this she went numb for a while. She somehow managed to rush to the hospital counter and asked for his ward number. The receptionist searched through his database and reported that there was no patient with his name. She insisted that the phone call gave her this address only. But the person on the counter refused again.

She quickly visited her phone call history but failed to find the number that had called her. She had probably deleted the number by mistake. Her anxiety augmented. She didn't know what to do or whom to ask for help.

An elderly man observing her restlessness suggested her to try calling her husband’s phone just in case he answers. This was much of a common sense thing but under the haze of worry she had not thought of this option.

She quickly reached out to her phone and dialed his number. The bell rang. But no one answered. Tears mixed with her sweat of worry trickled down her cheek. She only wished in her subconscious mind that it were just a bad dream.

Just when she had almost given up her hope on the situation, her phone rang. No, it was not him. She lost her consciousness and fell there. The old man took the phone and received the call. It was her neighbor Rita who in an anxious voice, without hearing this old man, said, ‘Pretha where are you? Your kids were running out of the apartment and your door was ajar. Why can’t you be careful with your kids and home? Please come back from wherever you are as they are crying and looking out for you.’

This man replied that she has come to the hospital looking for her husband who has met with an accident. She promptly replied, ‘her Husband who died two years back, has met with an accident!!’, and she took a deep breath, having understood what just happened. But the man still seemed perplexed.

Then she explained him the tragedy about Pretha. “True that her husband died in a road accident. But it had happened two years back. And Pretha is since then under a deep trauma, from which she has yet not recovered. She keeps waiting for him everyday and at times when her adrenaline rush is really low, she ends up hallucinating about him in different ways like this one”.

Rita came to the hospital and took her back home. Pretha’s kids came running and jumped into her arms. Pretha realized that what just happened was just another sour outcome of her misery. She loved her husband badly and could still not recover from the pain of his loss.

She used to engage herself with her kids. She was under medication to battle her depression.   But at times when her soul failed to fight strong, the medicines would also fail. Life went on with her relatives and friends visiting her now and then.

One day when her kids came back from school, they saw a herd of people including the relatives standing in their house. In a corner was their mother’s dead body lying. Their granny held them and took to the other room where they learnt that earlier that day their mom had hung herself from the ceiling fan. This was indeed a shock of their life.

They were taken to their grandparents who took their charge and started looking after them from then. The kids by now had learnt that their life was not as gifted as their friends. But they had to learn to live and to fight all odds, to succeed in life.

402-A was gradually declared a haunted house as the people around often complained that they heard human voices coming from the locked house. And that they heard sounds – of Rita singing - her husband laughing – the (already disconnected) landline phone ringing – and so on.  

Sound of Calm

In water pool – wide and blue
I let my self go afloat
Lying on the surface – all let loose
Gazing up  – Like abandoned boat

With water swinging by my back
And bubbly waves singing up there
I feel a warmth of stream that flows
And lub-dub of my heartbeat clear

My ears rest under the surface blue
Eyes open under the cloudy sky
I feel my breath and blood all through
And soul going up – up one note high 

The pristine pool that holds me high
Whispers by my soul so blue
‘Stop running hopping wide around
The gift of calm ‘s inside of You’

Murphy's Law in Recruitment Drives

I am an IT professional with a handful of experience now on appearing in interviews.  I reside in the city popularly nick named as ‘the IT hub of India’. But one cannot be sure here that he or she would be selected even after a hunky-dory performance in interview. Not because of one’s flop show, but quite often because of a sloppy recruitment process and management.

Not only I, but few others of my acquaintances too have had this irksome experience of being a part of some sagging recruitment drive. I once had a telephonic round of interview scheduled at 10 am on a weekday. I had taken permission of the project manager of my erstwhile organization to come late to office that day, obviously not to attend the interview but for an ‘urgent personal work’. I at my residence was ready and set for the call. The interviewer was punctual enough to ring me up at dot ten. The interview went well. It was one of my dream companies to work with. The interviewer’s response by the end was quite positive. But a protocol is, they do not declare then, if the candidate has been selected or rejected.  So I was not apprised of my result at that time. I waited till the weekend. The very next Monday I received a mail from the recruitment team, ‘since you did not attend the scheduled interview, it has been marked as null and void. Please re-schedule your appointment’.

This was one example. Another not so happening event happened when I was called for a face to face interview in another company. As was expected, I along with a bunch of other candidates for different skill sets had reached the venue on time, i.e. 9 am. The interview didn’t start even till lunch time. We were patiently waiting for it to begin at the least, forget about the wait for our individual turns. On inquiring, one of the volunteers said the interview panel has not yet arrived.

 As if this was not enough to outrage our restless souls, another one fibbed, the panel is interviewing another set of candidates. We were wondering if they were interviewing some ghostly null set, as we - the union of candidates that was sitting together - were the only ones in the entire set. In a while another volunteer reported - panel has left for lunch, we could break too, for next half an hour.

Clutching our emotions together, we left for lunch and came back in another half an hour. We were told to further wait for few more minutes. And the interview finally began. I was eagerly and later lethargically waiting for the call. It was only 5 pm when I realized there is something wrong. I should have been called by then. My bad for a late response. On inquiring I found they had somehow misplaced my resume, which I had submitted in the morning. The candidates were being called in the order they had submitted their resume. But my call never came. They apologized, but my peeved mind was in no mood to entertain any further nuisance. By the time they managed my entry to the interview hall, it was the time for the panel to call for the day. I was genteelly requested to leave and was apologized for the discomfort.

These are couple of the most common problems faced now and then, during recruitment drives. And unfortunately these incidents keep repeating and go unnoticed. Not sure where the lag is, but the needy and unfortunate candidates are at times punished in disguise due to sagging recruitment management process.

Not to forget, there definitely are the lucky chaps who do not get to suffer so much on these events and do crack the interviews without any hassle, just by dint of their talent and proper delivery. But as the Murphy’s law goes - Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

This is quite apprehensive that the recruitment drive cannot be made completely lucid. But a little more clarity and docility in these processes need to be heeded better by the recruitment teams of most of the renowned organizations. For such pesky and troublesome incidents prove to be bane for the few talented but unfortunate lots.